One of the most common problems in relationships today is expressing how we feel in a meaningful way to someone else. Long-lasting relationships take time, work and commitment; and when you’re not on the same page it can be rather stressful and overwhelming to the point it feels impossible. However, knowing your partners love language helps improve the relationship. Love Language is the way you express affection for the people you love and the way you want to be loved be expressed back to you.
The term ‘Love Language’ comes from Marriage Counsellor Dr Gary Chapman who wrote the book ‘The 5 Love Languages: The Secret in Love that Lasts’
“People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.”
― Gary Chapman
What are the 5 love languages?
Words of Affirmation
This is saying supportive things to your partner. They find that words speak louder than actions. This type really love compliments and will usually really like to hear ‘I Love You’. They will hear this and cherish it the most.
Acts of Service
This would be doing things for your partner. People who prefer Acts of Service are more actions speak louder than words (as opposed to Words of Affirmation). They’d rather be shown than told that they are cared for. This could be helping out with the chores or doing a task you’ve been putting off for ages. They take that as proof their partner loves them and wants to take care of them.
This love language seems to come off as materialistic to some people. However, this language isn’t about how big or small the gift is but actually the thoughtfulness of the gift itself. This type loves to receive gifts as it shows their partner is paying attention and giving your partner gifts will let them know you’re thinking of them. They will put a lot of time and attention into holidays and events such as birthdays and anniversaries.
This can be another word for attention. They really enjoy spending time with their partner. Whether it’s a cheap date night at home or splashing out at a fancy restaurant. These people will want you to know they are interested in what you have to say and what you are feeling. So for most people sitting with their partner and on the phone can be annoying for this type.
This doesn’t have to be sexual, this just means being touched, a massage, caressing etc. They would love hair strokes, back rubs and cuddles and kisses so when their partner isn’t as physical back it can make them feel sad and lonely.
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